You know the term "baby blues"? They usually come a few days after the baby is born and can stay around for several weeks or even months and can turn your life upside down with it's darkness. Not only are you trying to adjust to this new normal in your life but your hormones are adjusting as well and going back to pre-pregnancy normalcy. I sing with joy for the ladies who haven't been touched by the "blues" and cry out for the ones that have. My dear little one arrived about 3 months ago and my body went into "AHHHHHH" mode for about 8 weeks, off and on. It. Was. Not. Fun. It was horrible.
However,
Through it, I have been turned into a new person. I clung to God with all my might and although there were days where I was sure He was not there, I know He was right there, holding me the whole time. My relationship with Dom has also been strengthened to a whole new level and even though those long weeks were scary, sad, depressing, he made sure I laughed, cried and was held physically through it all. I am so so so thankful for an understanding husband.
And now, finally, I can say I have baby yellows!
Baby yellows?
I was trying to find a color that is opposite of blue and I believe yellow fits. It's bright, sunny and warm! And that is how I feel!
I am so so so so so so so happy! Happy to be a mom, to have 2 amazing girlies, to have an awesome husband and wonderful friends and family. I am so happy for a home to clean and decorate! I am so happy to be under the blood of the Lamb.
But most of all, I am so happy for hormones that are back to normal.
Praise God, Praise God, Praise God!!!
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Sunday, April 29, 2012
My Darling Sweet Char
She's here!
It has taken me a couple of weeks to write this. I'm so happy about my labor and delivery and ultimately, my beautiful little girl. I'm also so happy and joyful at the journey this pregnancy has taken me on. When I first had my csection with Lilly, I was fine and dandy with it. However, I had this deep yearning to experience a "normal" delivery. It became a prayer of mine, that God would allow me to experience this with our next child. When Lilly was about 1, we decided to try again and one month later I was sending a picture of a pregnancy test to my hubby over the phone. 
With Lilly, I had just used the docs and midwives at our local hospital. While I liked the midwives, I knew with trying a VBAC (Vaginal Birth after Ceserean), the chances of having a doc would be great and I know that most of the docs there are not too fond of VBACs. I wanted someone that would work with me and not shut down my trial of labor if things weren't going 100% right.
I was so happy when I found out that a local birthing center had delivering privileges at this hospital! (Happy dance!)
So many times during this pregnancy I felt defeated. Towards the end, I had to have a meeting with one of the hospital's docs to get approved for a trail of labor. I was not looking forward to this meeting AT ALL! I was told that my pelvic arch was narrow and that this baby was going to be big. Probably too big to fit through. Baby was also in the breach position. She kept flipping to the breach position, even up until week 38. The doc that I had to meet with kept trying to get me to set a date for a csection incase she didn't flip by week 38.5 or if I went past my due date because she'll probably be too big anyways. I'm so glad I said "No" and just listened to my midwives. She also said that I probably had a 20% chance of having a VBAC. I left that meeting just feeling so defeated. I had to cry but Dom was so supportive and by the next day I was back to feeling confident. During the meeting I kept thinking "BUT GOD!" I knew that I was in His hands and if He wanted me to have a VBAC, He would open me up and allow everything to happen the way it's suppose to. I wish so badly that this Doc could have seen my delievery so I could say "HA!" 
Miss Charlotte Ann arrived March 2 at 11:48am after about 12 hours of labor. (24 hours if you count the predormal labor I had the day before.) About 10pm March 1, my contractions finally started to become regular after having them all day. By midnight we called the midwife and our doula. Our plan was to stay home as long as possible before heading into the hospital in order to have a better chance at a VBAC however we still went in a good bit early. By the time we decided to head in, my contractions were about 3-4mins apart lasting 1min and I was unable to talk through them. The ride there was fun *insert sarcasm here* ![]()
By the time we got in there it was around 2am (March 2) and I was checked and at 3cms. Blehhh, I was hoping for more since at this point the pain was intense! They couldn't admit me till I as 4cm so 2 hours later, they checked again and I was at 4. I was happy to able to be admitted however bummed that I was only 4 but the mw said my cervix was paper thin. Not too much after that, I thought I was having some pressure and by the way my contractions were coming, everyone thought I had made some big progress. So the mw checked me again however, I was only 4 1/2. Haha, that stank but I just laid down and started to rest in between contractions; I was sooo tired! I could tell the mw was not pleased with my progress and so she asked if she could break my water which I agreed to. I wish I could have felt a huge gush like so many woman talk about, haha, but it was not. I could tell the midwife was not happy. I asked Dom and he said that the water was kinda stained. I then heard the midwife talking to the nurse and telling her that there wasn't a lot of water and there was meconium. OOOOH boy, here we go again, just like last time. I thought for sure we were going to the operating room. However.... God was in control and this was surely not going to stand in His way. The hours kinda blurred together at this point but around 7:30am I heard the nurse ask my mw "So when does your relief come?" Since I was not using the hospital doctors or mw's (I went through Birth Care Birthing Center which can deliver at this hospital), I thought I'd have the same mw the whole time. I was kinda upset but I was excited to see who would be coming on because while I liked the mw I had, she was older and not helping a whole lot.... ![]()
So at 8am, the new mw came on and it was the one that I had for my last 2 visits. She is about my age and I LOVE HER! haha She was right there with me and coaching me and best part, she is a Christian and gave me such encouragement! When she got into the room and saw me laying down she got me up (although I really didn't want to lol) and that's when things really started to pick up. She asked if she could check me and I said that I was scared. I was afraid that I was only going to be dilated to 5 or 6. I was 7 1/2! Whoohooo! That was about 8:30am or 9 and from that time on, things really got going! It was so exciting to hear the room start to fill with more nurses and carts with delivery tools (not sure that's the right wording haha) as the time went by. I just kept thinking, "Oh my goodness, I'm getting farther and farther along!". By 10:30am I was checked again because my body was starting to push with the contractions and I only have a little bit of cervix left so the midwife held it back while I pushed and the babies head started to come down. Um can I just say that I never knew a cervix could cause sooooo much pain! OUCH!
I've heard it said already that pushing feels really good, all the pain kinda goes away. Uh yea, not the case for me. It hurt so bad as she started to descend. YIKES! At this point I asked if anyone would want to trade places with me. PLEASEEEE! haha I was so sure that I would not be able to do this and kept praying to God that He would give me His strength and to please make this end sooooon!! It was so amazing to hear everyone around me praying and encouraging me.
I started pushing around 10:45am and at 11:43am, Charlotte was born! I will never ever forget that sight as I looked down and saw my baby looking up at me! I will never ever forget the feeling of her slimy warm body in my arms. I am so so so thankful that God allowed me to experience that. I just kept saying, "Oh my word!" And everyone was saying "You did it!" I could hardly believe that I actually had a VBAC. Looking back now, I very much doubted that it would actually happen and for that I had to ask for God's forgiveness.
She came out so fast that I tore a bit and had to have some stitches. As I was basking in the newborn sweetness, I all of a sudden remember my "narrow pelvic arch". I asked the midwife about it and she just shrugged and said I just pushed right past it with no problem! To God be the glory! Great things He hath done!
When I'm having a stressful day or I need some encouargment, I just think about that day when I first held Charlotte and how God's hand was in it all and I just get warm and fuzzy.![]()
While going through this pregnancy, God showed me and taught me so many things. I know that I know that I KNOW that God's hand is in everything and that He will never leave me nor forsake me. I also know that He loves me so much! And even if He would have had me have another csection, my love for Him would not change. And I told Him that all along. I believe He had me going through all this to prepare me for the time after Charlotte was born. With Lilly, I had the normal baby blues that sometimes come after, lasting only a couple of weeks. However, this time around, it's been much harder. I've had to FULLY lean on God and cling to Him. It's hard going from 1 child to a 1 (almost 2) year old and a newborn. Specially when the newborn wants to be held all the time. But God is good and has been blessing my socks off. When I'm feeling blue, I just start praising God and counting all my blessings.
God is good, all the time!
Our first time meeting!
Daddy's girl
Charlotte Ann- feminine, grace and favour
Annnnnd the best picture of all....our first family picture.... when ever I need a good laugh, I just find this picture. Feel free to use it too. haha!
My darling sweet Char!
I'm linking up with The Modest Mom! Join Here!
By the time we got in there it was around 2am (March 2) and I was checked and at 3cms. Blehhh, I was hoping for more since at this point the pain was intense! They couldn't admit me till I as 4cm so 2 hours later, they checked again and I was at 4. I was happy to able to be admitted however bummed that I was only 4 but the mw said my cervix was paper thin. Not too much after that, I thought I was having some pressure and by the way my contractions were coming, everyone thought I had made some big progress. So the mw checked me again however, I was only 4 1/2. Haha, that stank but I just laid down and started to rest in between contractions; I was sooo tired! I could tell the mw was not pleased with my progress and so she asked if she could break my water which I agreed to. I wish I could have felt a huge gush like so many woman talk about, haha, but it was not. I could tell the midwife was not happy. I asked Dom and he said that the water was kinda stained. I then heard the midwife talking to the nurse and telling her that there wasn't a lot of water and there was meconium. OOOOH boy, here we go again, just like last time. I thought for sure we were going to the operating room. However.... God was in control and this was surely not going to stand in His way. The hours kinda blurred together at this point but around 7:30am I heard the nurse ask my mw "So when does your relief come?" Since I was not using the hospital doctors or mw's (I went through Birth Care Birthing Center which can deliver at this hospital), I thought I'd have the same mw the whole time. I was kinda upset but I was excited to see who would be coming on because while I liked the mw I had, she was older and not helping a whole lot.... 
So at 8am, the new mw came on and it was the one that I had for my last 2 visits. She is about my age and I LOVE HER! haha She was right there with me and coaching me and best part, she is a Christian and gave me such encouragement! When she got into the room and saw me laying down she got me up (although I really didn't want to lol) and that's when things really started to pick up. She asked if she could check me and I said that I was scared. I was afraid that I was only going to be dilated to 5 or 6. I was 7 1/2! Whoohooo! That was about 8:30am or 9 and from that time on, things really got going! It was so exciting to hear the room start to fill with more nurses and carts with delivery tools (not sure that's the right wording haha) as the time went by. I just kept thinking, "Oh my goodness, I'm getting farther and farther along!". By 10:30am I was checked again because my body was starting to push with the contractions and I only have a little bit of cervix left so the midwife held it back while I pushed and the babies head started to come down. Um can I just say that I never knew a cervix could cause sooooo much pain! OUCH!I've heard it said already that pushing feels really good, all the pain kinda goes away. Uh yea, not the case for me. It hurt so bad as she started to descend. YIKES! At this point I asked if anyone would want to trade places with me. PLEASEEEE! haha I was so sure that I would not be able to do this and kept praying to God that He would give me His strength and to please make this end sooooon!! It was so amazing to hear everyone around me praying and encouraging me.
I started pushing around 10:45am and at 11:43am, Charlotte was born! I will never ever forget that sight as I looked down and saw my baby looking up at me! I will never ever forget the feeling of her slimy warm body in my arms. I am so so so thankful that God allowed me to experience that. I just kept saying, "Oh my word!" And everyone was saying "You did it!" I could hardly believe that I actually had a VBAC. Looking back now, I very much doubted that it would actually happen and for that I had to ask for God's forgiveness.
She came out so fast that I tore a bit and had to have some stitches. As I was basking in the newborn sweetness, I all of a sudden remember my "narrow pelvic arch". I asked the midwife about it and she just shrugged and said I just pushed right past it with no problem! To God be the glory! Great things He hath done!
When I'm having a stressful day or I need some encouargment, I just think about that day when I first held Charlotte and how God's hand was in it all and I just get warm and fuzzy.
While going through this pregnancy, God showed me and taught me so many things. I know that I know that I KNOW that God's hand is in everything and that He will never leave me nor forsake me. I also know that He loves me so much! And even if He would have had me have another csection, my love for Him would not change. And I told Him that all along. I believe He had me going through all this to prepare me for the time after Charlotte was born. With Lilly, I had the normal baby blues that sometimes come after, lasting only a couple of weeks. However, this time around, it's been much harder. I've had to FULLY lean on God and cling to Him. It's hard going from 1 child to a 1 (almost 2) year old and a newborn. Specially when the newborn wants to be held all the time. But God is good and has been blessing my socks off. When I'm feeling blue, I just start praising God and counting all my blessings.
God is good, all the time!
Our first time meeting!
Daddy's girl
Charlotte Ann- feminine, grace and favour
Annnnnd the best picture of all....our first family picture.... when ever I need a good laugh, I just find this picture. Feel free to use it too. haha!
My darling sweet Char!
I'm linking up with The Modest Mom! Join Here!
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
gDiaper Giveaway
gDiaper Giveaway
Check out this site for a cloth diaper giveaway!
Also....
Charlotte Ann has arrived!
I will be posting my birth story soon!
Check out this site for a cloth diaper giveaway!
Also....
Charlotte Ann has arrived!
I will be posting my birth story soon!
Friday, February 17, 2012
Friday Sunshine
What a beautiful day! Today my list looks like this...
Today I am 37 weeks and 4 days but I'm feeling pretty good. I was really sore but it gets better when I do my prenatal yoga. Which by the way, should be on my list but I doubt I'll be able to get it in while Lilly is still sleeping. It's virtally impossible to do with her awake because she is ALLLLL up in my business trying to do it with me. :-) Kinda cute but not so much relaxing.
For this pregnancy I am doing a VBAC. I am super excited; I feel like it's the only thing that's been on my mind since having Lilly and I'm just ready to do it! We will be staying home as long as possible, like until I'm pushing, then heading to the hospital which is only about 15mins away. We are having a lady from our church come out to be our doula and I'm really happy about our plan. My prayer right now is that baby comes sooner rather than later for the fear of her being too "big" which I'm afraid will make the midwives nervous and lead to a repeat c/s. But my trust is in the LORD, and I know HE will take care of me and baby.
I will make sure to update more often!
- run to BB's (local dent and bent) and Dutch Way
- clean up the house (does it ever stay clean???)
- make baked oatmeal
- wash the dishes
- clean out fridge(yuck!)
- wash towels and hang out on the line since it's such a mild day!
- do my Beth Moore Esther bible study for today (love love love this bible study!)
- wash my kitchen floor
- read and relax while Lilly sleeps!
- get ready for girls night! (ordering out chinese food and watching the Help)
Today I am 37 weeks and 4 days but I'm feeling pretty good. I was really sore but it gets better when I do my prenatal yoga. Which by the way, should be on my list but I doubt I'll be able to get it in while Lilly is still sleeping. It's virtally impossible to do with her awake because she is ALLLLL up in my business trying to do it with me. :-) Kinda cute but not so much relaxing.
For this pregnancy I am doing a VBAC. I am super excited; I feel like it's the only thing that's been on my mind since having Lilly and I'm just ready to do it! We will be staying home as long as possible, like until I'm pushing, then heading to the hospital which is only about 15mins away. We are having a lady from our church come out to be our doula and I'm really happy about our plan. My prayer right now is that baby comes sooner rather than later for the fear of her being too "big" which I'm afraid will make the midwives nervous and lead to a repeat c/s. But my trust is in the LORD, and I know HE will take care of me and baby.
I will make sure to update more often!
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Planning the Garden for 2012!
It's that time of year again! Time to start planning the garden! This is pretty much my favorite part of the whole gardening process, haha. I love to plan and organize. My hubby and I are still learning and so when it actually comes time to plant (not too hard), weed (yikes, last year we grew some awful tall weeds) and harvest (2nd best part!) we're a little "green around the edges". ;-)
I always have such high hopes and so I'm going to try really really hard this year and not let the garden go to pits like we did last year. Come March, Lord willing, we will be adding another little darling to this family and so I'm hoping by May, I will be in a new grind and ready to tackle this adventure with some fresh energy and excitement! I wish I could bottle up this enthusiasm for once July and August come around and it's time to freeze and can as well.
My question for ya'll, any tips? And also, what are some of your favorite veggies to plant?
Oh, by the way, did I mention that my hubby made our garden about the size of a football field?? Ok, not that big, but still very daunting...
I'm linking up on Raising Homemakers , check it out!
I'm linking up on Raising Homemakers , check it out!
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Mommy and Baby Time
Baby and I had some yoga/palates time together today. In the words of the instructor, it felt "yummy".
I've never been real fit or active however I really am working hard to fight my laziness and get moving. This is really important right now because I need to be fit and not let this child inside of me get too big. With my first little one (whose now 19mns old) I had a csection. For this pregnancy, I really wanted to avoid another one and so I went with a birthing center that's going to work with me to have a VBAC. It's really something to see how involved they are in my diet, exercise, etc.. , so much more than the hospital was with my first one. I am measuring a few weeks ahead with this pregnancy so I really need to cut back on my carbs and up my proteins. (Rather hard to do this time of year..)
Prayers would be appreciated. =)
In closing, I did a really dumb thing today...I dropped my phone in my glass of water.
Not. Cool.
Anyways, hope everyone had a blessed Christmas!
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